6 Summer Time Inspirations

As the winter is finally winding down here in South Africa (I'm bracing myself for one more cold front), I feel myself getting amped for summer!

For me, summer embodies everything I love. From the warmer temperatures to the more sociable people all the way to the unplanned camping trips. I love the freedom summer brings both in wardrobe and events as well as the comfort of a big glass of sweet tea and a new book! Summer is filled with laughter and memories; braai's and pools! Honestly, I can't wait!

8 Inspirations for a Safari Themed Toddler Room

So....we finally got a house after what felt like forever of searching! As usual, I leave it to Hubby (since he was already there) to make the decision. And truthfully, I think he did amazing!

It’s a grassroof just outside of town. There is huge open land for us to relax with and only one neighbor (whom also has children!). The kitchen is big and open and a decent sized lounge and best of all....below our maximum budget price!

Along with this move comes the opportunity for us to finally begin arranging our house to our liking. We’ve put off any real decorating with the kids being so young, but now I think...I know I can finally start this project!

2014 Blogger Challenge: Inspiration

 

I’m a day late this time to the party and I’m so sorry! The holidays have been hectic with family coming and going over the last month. Add to that a vacation, a baby shower, two birthdays and New Years Eve...well, let’s just say as much fun as it was...I’m glad the last two months is over!

Life is beginning to go back to normal and so will the flow of this blog...I promise (I hope)!

Gaby over at Another Girl Blog proposed a 2014 BloggerChallenge. Normally, I avoid these types of things. I tried it once and I just got exhausted always trying to follow up with the memes. But this one seemeddifferent. It was a chance to stretch my content, expand my community and still stay real to who I am.

What you missed Week 37

Yes, peeps, another week has come and gone! And you know what, I'm enjoying life more and more! It amazes me the glory of God each day and all He does to ensure our happiness! 

I want to quickly remind all of you to get out there this weekend and share the Good News with someone! Pray for your spouse and your children and your dogs and your families and your best friends and PRAISE God for all He is doing in our lives!

I'm wanting feedback here in my little corner. So please, drop me an email or leave a comment! What can I do to improve? What do you want to see more of/less of? What do you like the most to read about? And how are you getting to my little blog? Do you follow via Facebook, Twitter, Bloglovin'? Why do you follow that way? 

I need your help to know where I'm heading!

What am I supposed to do now....

This is an extremely hard post for me to write.
I had something else planned. (I should know about plans by now.)
But I feel I just need to get it out there.
February is a month I hate. And no it isn't because of Valentines day.
As I wrote last week, I lost a VERY close friend in February 7 years ago.
In the last 15 years or so, I've lost A LOT of people in the month of February. I've lost grandparents, friends, a pastor, and loved ones. February seems to be a cursed month in my eyes. It totals more than 10 people I've loved.
2013 is proving to follow suit and it makes me want to crawl into a hole out of grasps of the pains in this world.
I received a message from my mother last week Thursday.
My uncle who was only 31 passed away in an accident at work.
I'm shocked....I'm discontent....I'm disconnected.
You see...
The pain is there. The realization that I will never again see this beloved friend is there.
But I'm not there. I'm here. I'm alone in all of this.
Hubby Dearest knows. He understands. He sympathizes. But as before I try to hide the pain away. It isn't fair he feels anything negative.
There is a guilt that comes with these situations. A guilt for us both that I am here and unable to be there.
I've learnt coping mechanisms over the years. I will speak regularly with my family. I will write. I will cry in silent waves as I shower or bath. My children will not know. My husband will not see. After a couple of months, the emails between my family and I will slow to a normal pace and the pain will fade into the background.
But I'm not there to say my goodbyes. I'm not there for the closure of seeing his face one last time. I'm not there to hold and be held by those in the midst of loss.
So the next time it happens...I relive this one too. Each time I loose someone...I live them all from before. There is no closure. There is no way to make my mind let go. I just keep in bottled. I keep it hidden. I keep it safe...
safe from whom...I am not sure.

Mikey was very close to me growing up. He is only 8 years older than I. We grew up two houses apart from each other. We would go fishing with my Dad. He taught me to skateboard. He walked me home from primary school everyday and fixed my after school snacks exactly how I wanted them.
I remember once when I was 6 I had some how managed to talk this teenager into playing beauty shop with me! He vowed never again.
I would curl up in his lap on the couch and watch Mortal Kombat (back when it was still cool...oh hell IT IS STILL COOL!! Our kids will never know the joys of the first video games!;-])
I remember when the 'air brush' art sets came out and he was one of the first to get one. I'd dance around him in my most annoying voice crying to get him to let me play with it!
I remember once when he got in trouble at the local Walmart and I cried in the car as my grandma had to go pick him up. As we stood there they asked me what was wrong and I feared they were 'a lockin' my Mikey away.' The things teenagers do right?!?
He introduced me to Snoop Doggity Dog and Tupac.
He laughed as I blared Britney Spears and Nsync and sung EVERY lyric. ;-)
Once, after having been warned multiple times by Mikey that I'd get hurt, I got hurt jumping from a barn to a trampoline. He was the first at my side and promised to never tell my parents what happened. He never did.
All the way up until I left America, I could always call on him. Whether it was that I wanted my ex-boyfriend scared or I needed a ride home from work at 2 am. He ALWAYS answered. He ALWAYS came. He ALWAYS smiled at me.
Most of all what I remember is him always being there when I needed or even wanted him. Never any questions. Never any grief. Just a smile and a hug.
I was his only niece but I swear God had given me a brother.

So in memory of my Mikey today I post this....

I know I’m far away today

As our family gathers near
God’s blessed us with a guardian
And another listening ear

I have so many memories
Each one I hold so tight
I can name them one by one
But man this don’t feel right

Please never think I haven’t cared
Or that I’ve forgotten all the years
You can see me now day and night
And know I’ve cried a thousand tears

You were more than just an uncle
Much more than a mere friend
I have so much love for you
A love that can never end

You were always there for me
Even when I was too young to know
Your impact helped to mold me
Your spirit helped me grow

Fishing trips and summer nights
Memories of a broken heart
After school snacks and learning tricks
The pain pierces like a dart

Today we say goodbye
But never will we forget
Mikey your love was infectious
Some things in life I just don’t get…..

I love you, man, and I know you're looking down and watching over me each day. Raise a peace sign to the heavens because your among the angels now.
To my Mom, Uncle Dan, and Aunt Liz. I know you're mourning a brother today. Cherish the memories. Give each other hugs for me. Soak in the love.

Shana..

The New Me....

If you haven't known before, I battle right now with a motivation issue. This stems from my feeling helpless about my physical health with pregnancy beyond making sure I'm doing everything for baby!

When I fell pregnant….


Okay I have to stop myself right there. We don’t really fall pregnant now do we? I find this statement hilarious because whenever I say it or hear it I automatically envision Hubby Dearest literally falling on top of me while I’m cleaning the kitchen or something and bouncing up like a cartoon as my belly suddenly protrudes through my clothing ripping it like the Incredible Hulk!

When I became pregnant with Boetie I thought for numerous reasons that this was the worst possible timing! However I quickly came over that as I knew I was blessed by God to be expanding our family!



This is me 2 months before moving to SA at 115lbs!



Pregnancy though put a major damper on my fitness plans! I’ve never been a particularly big girl. Meaning I’m barely over 5 foot and managed to keep an average weight of 115 after high school. In school though and for a while thereafter I was very active. I ran or went to the gym daily. I was in dance and soccer in school. I loved my body.

When I moved to South Africa though, things took a bit of a dive. I gained quite a bit of weight in a very short time period. In the first four months here, I jumped up to around 155 lbs. On such a small frame this was a tremendous amount!

But I didn’t regain my healthy lifestyle.



On my wedding day just shy of 150lbs

In America I drank a lot of coffee. Black coffee though. Occasionally with dessert some cream and sugar. But all day long just black. I drank about 4L of water a day as well. I was active and made a point to get in at least 30 minutes a day. On top of that I taught PE for an elementary school twice a week (which involves a lot of running too! They sit if you sit!). AND I was a waitress. This was on my feet a lot and surprisingly it helped me with my lifestyle.
In South Africa, I drank a lot of coffee. A lot of sugar, milk, instant coffee. I stopped drinking water almost completely. I was going to the jol’s a lot with Hubby Dearest. I NEVER did exercise..unless my new Hubby counted ;-). AND I spent most of my day at the crèche where I was working…sitting!

The food also made a huge difference. I LOVED the food here. I ate like crazy! I’d sit and eat two plates of food the size of Hubby Dearest’s plate. Most of this food was in the form of red meat too. I ate mostly chicken and fish in America. But here, I maxed on red meat like I’d never tasted anything so juicy in my life!

I think you’re getting the picture…

Lovely South African braai vleis!!

So now what does all of this have to do with now?

Just before becoming pregnant with Lil Mister I began losing weight again. I had cut down my portions and was back to working in restaurants. Plus my metabolism had begun to finally adjust to all of the changes. I dropped down to about 132. At the end of my pregnancy with Lil Mister I had only managed to reach 141.

This was okay though because Lil Mister was a healthy guy coming in at a whopping 7.9 lbs!

In January '12 at my skinniest...97lbs

After Lil Mister I dramatically lost weight in the same fashion I picked it up. I wasn’t trying at all but my body decided to go extreme in the other direction. I wound up sitting at 97lbs 3 months after giving birth. The dramatic weight loss made breastfeeding impossible.
Finally a year later I begin to get my health back in order. Realizing that weight gain wasn’t going to happen like it did before; I knew I had to do something. I started planning family meals. I had to start eating balanced meals 3 times a day.

I also started working out again. Best of all I started RUNNING!

I loved it and was doing very well! It gave me something to chart and track. I could see and feel my improvements each week.

Then morning sickness hit and it was a complete road block.

Now I’ve done well to keep myself some what active this pregnancy and am so relieved to say that I’ve finally hit my goal weight at about 141 again. After pregnancy I would like to get to an average between 115-120.

The biggest thing is getting myself out there and moving post pregnancy!

To do that I have to get my mind in the right place. As I said, I wasn’t extremely unhealthy by any means but I believe as a woman YOU have to be happy with yourself. This is especially important being a mom and a wife. My child can quickly see when I am not happy with me and I do not want him to grow up aware of this. If I am not happy with me then I must change me. It is really that simple. I want to live a healthier lifestyle.

So here is my go to 5 steps for getting myself motivated for post-pregnancy training!!

1) Plan, Plan, and Plan: No I do not think that my plans are rigid and going to be effective immediately. I’m aware that things may have to change a little bit. But the best way to keep myself motivated is to work out a workout plan. I’ve looked into cross training that I’ve done before and mapped out a rough draft of how I want my training to go. Any moves that I can do now from those workouts, well I do them now! I’m mentally aware of what I plan to do in what time frame and I’m introducing my body to this plan as well!
I’ve also started getting together a healthier menu. I want to breastfeed Boetie and train for my first half so I need to have a very balanced diet. But I have two other men (Lil Mister counts as a man if you knew his personality!) in the house to feed. Meals need to cater to all and still be healthy for all!

2) Stay involved: I can’t run a marathon right now! I know many women who did run through most of their pregnancies. I shamefully regret not being one of them, but that doesn’t mean I should exclude myself from the fitness world! Every time I read about another mommy runner hitting a PR or see another runner cross that finish line after a long road I cheer for them. I soak in their excitement and emotions. I store that for later when someone will be cheering for me. I stay up to date on what is going on. I read, blog, watch, and listen for any news on people, gear and races! The more involved I am the more excited I am for afterwards!

3) Talk about it: I don’t hide my dreams or goals from friends or family. I hound my husband constantly. Look at my workout tracker I’ve created. Listen to what I read about the Comrades. These races are these months. I start training again on this date. I’m positive they are all sick of hearing about it but it keeps it a part of my mind and heart. If you can, find a partner who is willing to do this with you! Hubby Dearest has agreed that if we join a gym then he will gym with me! That is a great motivation because it is like a date night!

4) Schedule: Especially when you have young children it can be very difficult to just ‘squeeze’ in that run. Schedule time for your workouts. Speak with your spouse, partner, or someone who will be looking after the children. Set a time up each day in which you will run/gym. If you don’t make time for it, the time will go without it. I have already stressed to Hubby and family how important this is to me and that Hubby and I must work out a schedule!

5) Set goals: This I think is my biggest motivator. I have already planned my first 5k and am waiting for races schedules for next year to begin planning the rest of my progress. My largest goal is to run the Comrades in 2016. Yea, that is 3 years from now but it is also a 90km race! I need some time and training. But every step leads me closer. So…set goals. Say you want to be running this far in this amount of time. Be realistic…i.e. my first 5k is 4 months post birth. Unrealistic would have been a half marathon or scheduling my 5k only 4 weeks afterwards! Setting goals gives you something to work towards!

Will everything work out as planned? Probably not. My plans are more of guidelines. But this is where I am. I’m focused. I’m staying involved. I’m planning, scheduling, and dreaming everyday of achieving my goals. Now we play the waiting game. I will keep you updated on where everything is and as soon as my training starts I’ll make sure you are bored glued to your screen to know each pain, cry, tear, and triumph this body and mind of mine accomplishes! We’ll see after Boetie is here how it all goes!

He is my King

I had a whole post planned out for today that I'd been working very hard on...however like most plans I make in life without consenting to God's will first it was derailed. I was getting so frustrated (bring on the tears preggy hormones!) as I couldn't make the words come out right. The post was random, unorganized, and completely missing the point.
Then I opened my journal to try and write and let go a little bit. When I did an article I'd kept from a service a while back fell out. Christ reminded me once again that He is King. Here is a little bit from Dr. S.M. Lockridge's famous sermon He Is My King.

My King is the King of the Jews.

He is the King of Israel.

He is the King of Righteousness.

He is the King of the Ages.

He is the King of Heaven.

He is the King of Glory.

He is the King of Kings.

And He is the Lord or Lords.

Yes, that is my King. I wonder, do you know Him?

My King is a sovereign King.

No means of measure can define His limitless love.

He is enduringly strong.

He is entirely sincere.

He is eternally steadfast.

He is immortally graceful.

He is imperially powerful.

He is impartially merciful.

Yea, that is my King. Do you know Him?

He is the greatest phenomenon that has ever crossed the horizon of this world.

He is God's Son.

He is the sinners Savior.

He is the centerpiece of civilization.

He is unparalleled.

He is unprecedented.

He is supreme.

He is preeminent.

He is the loftiest idea in literature.

he is the hightest personality in philosophy.

He is the fundamental doctrine of true theology.

He is the only one qualified to be an all sufficient Savior.

Yes, that is my King. I wonder if you know Him today?

He is the miracle of the age.

He is the superlative of everything good that you choose to call Him.

He is the only one able to supply all of our needs simultaneously.

He supplies strength for the weak.

He is available for the tempted and the tried.

He sympathizes and He saves.

He strengthens and sustains.

He guards and He guides.

He heals the sick.

He cleanses the lepers.

He forgives sinners.

He discharges debtors.

He delivers the captive.

He defends the feeble.

He blesses the young.

He serves the unfortunate.

He regards the aged.

He rewards the diligent and He beautifies the meek.

I wonder if you know Him?

My King is the key to knowledge.

He is the wellspring of wisdom.

He is the doorway of deliverance.

He is the pathway of peace.

He is the roadway of righteousness.

He is the highway of holiness.

He is the gateway of glory.

He is the master of the mighty.

He is the captain of conquerors and the head of the heroes.

My King is the leader of the legislators.

He is the overseer of the over comers.

He is the governor of governors.

He is the prince of princes.

My King is the King of kings and the Lord of lords.

Yes that is my King. I wonder do you know Him?

That is MY KING.

His office is manifold.

His promise is sure.

His life is matchless.

His goodness is limitless.

His mercy is everlasting.

His love never changes.

His Word is enough.

His grace is sufficient.

His reign is righteous.

His yoke is easy and His burden is light.

Oh, I wish I could describe Him to you, but...

He is indescribable.

He is incomprehensible.

He is invincible.

He is irresistible.

I'm trying to tell you...

The heavens of heavens cannot contain Him,

Let alone a man explain Him.
You can't get Him out of your mind

And you can't get Him off of your hands.

You cannot outlive Him and you can't live without Him.

The Pharisees couldn't stand Him, but they found out they couldn't stop Him.

Pilate couldn't find any fault in Him.

The witnesses couldn't get their testimonies to agree and Herod couldn't kill Him.

Death couldn't handle Him and the grave couldn't hold Him.

Yes, that is my King. I wonder, do you know Him?

He always has been and He always will be.

I'm talking about...

He has no predecessor and He'll have no successor.

There was nobody before Him and there'll be nobody after Him.

You cannot impeach Him and He is not going to resign.

Yes, that is My King.

I wonder...do you know Him today?

How Great is our God



Shana

Who is in control?

I’m a planner. Yep, I said it! I have a day planner for the entire year with month, week, and day sections. It has more tabs than some of the creditor files in my office. I spent weeks planning my planner. I have a blog planner too. I use this almost as often as I do chap stick! It is always open on my desk right with my planner. I jot ideas down, blogs to reply too, and plan the next entry (3 weeks away!). I also have a fitness planner! My first 4 months after pregnancy are already planned out for a perfect and natural labor. I have decided when will be my first 5km and researched and planned every second of my training. The school where my son attends for daycare provides breakfast, lunch and snack. Yet, still, I can’t help but plan his daily meals and therefore I send breakfast, lunch, two snacks, and his juice, water, tea, and milk! Oh yes, this is an illness. All of this planning stems from one deadly need. It is my need for control.


Actually this is a want but I mask it around like a need.

There are a lot of areas where I am perfectly capable of letting go of the control and others where I am exceptional at delegating. (Side note: after 10 years in the food service industry the last restaurant I worked for as a manager said upon my leaving that they will truly miss my capabilities of ‘delegating’ my work. I even managed to delegate my work to superiors at times masking it as their work! I’m that good!) I can let go of control in the dinner department at our house! MIL cooks most nights! I share in this but not on a daily basis. I also have let go of control in the laundry department! Hehe MIL is at home and does this for us too! I still pack away, scrub stains, and iron on weekends but during the week I am pretty much home free…yes I am spoilt still! Oh and the delegating! Since Hubby Dearest is at home all day as he works on call, I am quite capable at delegating certain tasks to be done each morning such as vacuuming the house or feeding the rats! Haha (insert evil laugh)

I love my family very much and am thankful for the fact that we have a system that functions most days without a hitch. I am not lazy but heck I work 10 hours a day, workout daily, have a toddler, am pregnant, and blog about it all!!

OKAY, back on point! I like to control my days. I control when I, my son, and my husband get up and get ready. I control how our mornings function, what Lil Mister wears and takes to school, and the mile long to-do list I am always editing. I freak if Lil Mister watches something I don’t approve of, is disciplined in a way I’m not comfortable with, or if the school did not handle a situation in the exact manner I would. I spend so much of my time planning that I forget to live sometimes. That is where God gave me a BIG reality check last week.

I’m actually not in control at all! I have all these plans but I’ve been failing to check with the big man upstairs whether or not my plans are matching his. It wasn’t in my plans to have a second child but here we are. I almost had a panic attack at first but now I am excited and ready to meet our bundle of love. It was in God’s plans not mine. I still think about all of my plans that got shifted around though. It wasn’t my plan when we gave up our apartment for a bigger house that we ended up not getting and had to move back in with our parents! It was in God’s plan though. And I’ve learnt to shift my views to do what he wants.

Oh but that control. You see, I’ve planned my maternity leave to a T. I will leave work half day on the 14th December. LJ is due on the 15th. I will do everything in my power to the extent of having an induction for LJ to be born on the 15th. He WILL NOT come early (you realize how distorted my plans make my logic!) I will begin my workouts again with walking on the 31st December. That is two weeks after LJ is born and that is when I was cleared for moderate physical activity with Lil Mister so I WILL be cleared this time. I WILL have a natural birth (I am scared to death of a c-section!). I WILL NOT have complications. LJ WILL be a boy….haha!! (Okay that one we have visual proof on but my mind was set even before the ultrasound! I think Hubby Dearest was relieved that LJ was a boy because he didn’t want to deal with the hormonal 20 week pregnant out of control wife!) I will run my 5km the 19th of April. See it is all planned. But….

What if God has other plans? What if LJ comes early and I must leave work sooner than planned. What if the gynae won’t induce (oh who am I kidding then I find one that will!)? What if LJ comes late? What if I have to have a c-section and am down for the full 6 weeks? I am starting to hyperventilate.

For most of you, these are all small things. One of those ‘it’s out of our hands’ type thoughts. God has everything in control. Yet, why does this not settle me? Why am I letting my fear of control loss impede my relationship with Christ?

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight. Prov. 3:5-6

In all your ways. This is where I got slapped in the face (okay literally Lil Mister was sitting on my lap and I was so engrossed in this verse that I didn’t notice his tractor needed fixed and wham!). But spiritually God knocked me one! Yea sure it is easy to give it to God once you can’t control it any more and you need Him to pick up the pieces. It is easy to say thank you when something great comes your way. It is easy to give your worship over and let His Spirit lead you where you need to go. But what happens when that worship leads you to your knees in front of God who is laying it out flat. No holds barred!!

I was on my knees while God starred down at me saying ‘Child, LET GO! You don’t know my plans for you. You have desires because I placed them in you for MY works! Your plans MUST line up with mine! You must let ME lead your family.’

Wait a minute, Lord. But my husband isn’t living a life in you right now. I need to be in control. I need to direct the spiritual warfare. I am the spiritual captain right now! If I let go, then who?

But God always has answers, you see. He made sure I knew right then and there that He was the captain. At that moment while I lay in bed trying to figure this puzzle out Hubby Dearest came in for the night and talked to me about everything going on in our life. We spoke about hurtful words and emotionally harmful choices. And God made sure I knew that was Him not me that lead that conversation. Although my prayers are still the most valid form of spiritual warfare, I must stop trying to lead where our battles go.

My need for control has gone so deep that I have taken away the pants in our family. Shame on me. I’m so focused on trying to do what is ‘right’ for my family I’m not asking God what he wants for my family. I have tried to take the lead position, a position in my family meant solely for my husband.

There are many plans in a man’s heart, Nevertheless the Lord’s counsel- that will stand. Proverbs 19:21

So today, I pray. I pray for peace as I begin to let go. I pray for strength as I battle the internal fight for control. Most of all I battle for wisdom from the Lord. That I will know when He is pushing me forward and when He is telling me to hold back. I pray for my family as they unknowingly embark on this journey with me. I pray that I embrace the change in myself. I praise the Lord for the freedom I will feel knowing HE is in control of my life and that I happily sit in the passengers’ seat. I praise the Lord for the joy I will know in releasing what I can not have a say in. I praise the Lord for allowing me to be open to His criticism. Thank you Lord.

Proverbs 11:2 - 8

When pride comes, then comes shame, but with humility comes wisdom. The integrity of the upright shall guide them, but the perverseness of the treacherous shall destroy them. Riches don't profit in the day of wrath, but righteousness delivers from death. The righteousness of the blameless will direct his way, but the wicked shall fall by his own wickedness. The righteousness of the upright shall deliver them, but the unfaithful will be trapped by evil desires. When a wicked man dies, hope perishes, and expectation of power comes to nothing. A righteous person is delivered out of trouble, and the wicked takes his place

I Am.....

I orginally found this blog at YKIHAYHT and since I do absolutely love her blogs I knew I had to repeat it. It was stored away for today! It is a quick brain jog. It is simple. It is fun. It is a great piece of writing to keep for the days when you need a little self motivation. They idea is to be POSITIVE!
The rules are easy:
Write for 5 minutes without stopping. No editing, no proof reading, no checking.
When you're done hopefully you'll post it and share with us!
I know...it seems like SO MUCH right! It's not! We all want our blogs to appear so laid out and perfected but here is a chance to be real and be proud of it! So Go For It!!!

I am Shana.
I am a mother.
I am a wife.
I am a daughter.
I am a child of God.
I am unique. Not in the sense that I am so different from the average mom/wife but that God specifically designed me for a purpose.
I am seeking. I am seeking answers to lifes big questions. I am seeking ways to show my boys how to be Godly men. I am seeking peace. I am seeking me.
I am a runner...although I can't right now. It is in my body like blood or bones! I need it like I need oxygen.
I am a girl who loves to laugh. Sorry to all the sappy romantics but I'll choose a comedy any day. I think laughter feeds the soul! It is good for us!
I am a hopeless romantic. No matter how bad things get I believe in my marriage and I believe in my love at first sight husband. I believe in us.
I am a faithful person. I talk a lot and that makes people think that I spill everything, but this isn't true. I am faithful to my husband. I am faithful to the secrets shared between friends. I am faithful to my word once given. I am faithful to myself and my values.
I am American!! Whoa...that was something I never thought I'd be ashamed of and am SO So proud I got over it! I am AMERICAN!
I am also South African. I love this country. I am glad to raise my children here. I am excited to put that on my name!
I am creative.
I am a planner...obsessively.
I am goal oriented. There are goals and places I want myself and my family to be. Everything I do is focused on achieving those goals!
I am a person who tends to put myself last! Yes although I eat healthy and workout I always find ways to do that around what my husband, kids, parents and siblings need first! We are a big happy family in one house and you know what...I don't even mind being last! (MIL and I compete for that spot because we LOVE seeing our family happy!)
I am a loving and caring person.
I am in love with my husband.
I am Shana.

Shew that wasn't so hard and I wrote much more than I thought!! I hope that you can take from this what you need, learn a little about me, and do it for yourself!! Have fun!

Inspiration....

Inspiration is a tricking concept. Inspire is described as the action of filling a person with an animation, quickening, or exalting influence. It is to directly influence another person in a positive manner. Inspiration, therefore, is a divine influence directly and immediately exerted upon the mind and soul….


Hmm…okay that is my smarts for the day. But what does this have to do with anything you ask.

I’m getting there! Hold your horses!

Some are easily inspired. In a lot of ways I envy these people. For it seems as if the mere sight of a butterfly flapping its wings against the wind can create within them a master piece.

On the other hand, I am grateful that I am not so instantaneously swayed. I prefer that it takes more to get under my skin. Blame it on my stubbornness but I just can’t usually take just any person’s words or actions to heart and develop a new outlook or creativity from this. Inspiration is something that I typically believe comes from within. There are triggers like a beautiful sunset or the solemn view of a bird at the waters edge, but it is the idea that is already inside of you that these images bring out.

Still, there has been one source of inspiration for me over the years. It has taken me a little while to figure out where this inspiration was leading me and I’m actually quite distraught with myself to realize it has led me to the most obvious place. Again, my strong head probably blocked all of these years what was already there!

The origination of this inspiration is in another person. This person, well woman, began inspiring me in high school (the height of my stubbornness). I have since been able to stalk follow her on the web across the world with the wonders of social networking! ;-) She was a teacher of mine. Allow me to rephrase that. I was a student of hers. I had many teachers in the literal sense of the word, but I was a student to so few of them in reality. The rest I was merely a talkative know it all in their daily classroom! I choose to say it this way because although I had many adults standing in front of classrooms rambling on about I don’t know what over the years, it was a very select few that actually knew how to dig deep and teach lessons that we will apply in life. Not anyone can impact their students’ lives years later in the way Mrs. McClure has mine. It takes a special kind of person to do this.

I don’t believe I was the easiest student to deal with. I seemed to have been a late bloomer in the mind to mouth filter department and was always easily distracted. Also, despite being smart, I had this thing against homework and always managed the most absurd excuses as to why it wasn’t done!

Sidebar: Let me thank you now, Mrs. McClure, and all my other teachers!, for listening to the nonsense and pushing me forward! I raise my water glass (we’ll pretend it’s wine!) to you!!

Even with the challenges Mrs. McClure would put into our class work, I always looked forward to her class. I actually took a semester of economics just to be in her class again after a year in European history. (This must tell some of you how great she is because she even made dead fat guys and political finances seem interesting!)

The part I enjoyed the most over those few years in her classes was that she was personal. She was real! She did what she loved and joined her other loves with it! All her students know she is a tri-athlete because she openly talks about it all the time (and I only saw her twice in 4 years without New Balance on!) and she hangs all her numbers from races in her classroom! She brought her excitement into everyday. She would give us a run down, play by play, after each race. We were tuned in and aware of her training for Iron Man. She was honest when it was good and honest when it was bad. None of this had a lot to do with history (other than hers!) except that we had a much more open classroom. We spoke on current events. Everything from politics to TV shows.

Sidebar again: I was in school when the first season of Desperate Housewives aired. I did not, and still don’t, watch this show. However it was a topic every week in our class because it seemed EVERYONE in my class did, including you Mrs. McClure. The day after the episode where someone killed someone and buried them in the backyard, I was in a fit! I couldn’t believe how the police were allowing this to be aired on TV! I was all for reality TV but couldn’t the camera men and people get in trouble for not reporting this? And that is when, in between tears and hysteria, Mrs. McClure kindly informed me that this was NOT a reality TV show. Oh yea!

I could go on for another however long rambling about all the memories I had in her classroom (I’m still sorry for the penis that was drawn on her chalkboard in permanent marker by a fellow student…I’m sorry because her face was only too priceless at the end of the year when she finally saw it after 7 months!) But the point is how she has inspired me!! For the last 7 years since I first sat in her classroom, I’ve carried with me the love she poured into her training. She brought that love and commitment with her everyday. We saw affects of her training. We saw her excitement close to races. (We experienced the negativities of her training in pop quizzes :-]) It wasn’t hidden. It wasn’t taboo in the school. It was perfectly right to instill this into us.

The mental and physical benefits would radiate from her as the excitement attached itself to us students. We could cheer with her! We could learn from her. We could support her!

All these years, she has stuck with and made time for something that she loved and that was important to her. No excuses, no walking away because of other commitments, and no giving up! I’ve watched her push and push.

I left school and began moving on. Still remembering the excitement she used to bring. I planned my trip to South Africa (having been warned by Mrs. McClure outside of Panera Bread to make sure I’m not eaten by a Zulu. Thank you for making me realize how unprepared I was because I had to go research what a Zulu was after that comment!) I still found Mrs. McClure online and quickly began stalking following her again! Reading each comment about another run, bike, or swim.

Then one day, I hit the road. I started running. For the first time, not chasing after a soccer ball or because the gym teacher said I had to, I just ran. And it clicked. Mrs. McClure had inspired me to find something I love; that I could love in all areas of my life. That inspiration led me to…duh duh duh…RUNNING! Who would have thought that this inspiration I held so dear to but couldn’t do anything with from a tri-athlete would encourage me to…be…athletic?!!?

Are you gathering my self sarcasm here?

That inspiration is about more than the training and races. It is about sticking it out. It is about putting in the effort necessary to achieve the results. It is about commitment and sacrifice. And it is about enjoying all of it...the good and the bad!
I started running and loved it. Now my pregnant butt just wants to run again! My husband knows this. My family is beginning to get it. They are all becoming aware that one lesson I’ve learnt is to make time and just do it! No excuses! And the best part is, I really do LOVE it!
Thank you Mrs. McClure!

Shana