Organized Chaos

Friday 24 May 2013

Horror...beyond words

Disclaimer: This is a harsh subject. The opinions held in this post are strictly my own. As part of my blog, I always endeavor to be honest to you and therefore tell you exactly how I feel when subjects are brought up. I do not wish to ask anyone to change their opinion on views and therefore ask that you refrain from criticizing mine. This subject is detailed, horrific, gruesome, troublesome, gut wrenching and an absolute outcry. Please read on in warning.

Maybe I shouldn’t broach the subject….
But my mind cannot allow me to lay to rest the horror that has been stirred up inside of me.
Jenn over at SomethingClever2.0 posed the question to us last Thursday as to whether evil existed in the world. I answered her here.
To my dismay, though….something greater has come across my www.

The second part of the question is why does evil exist if you so choose to believe it does. I’m sorry that I do not have the answers to this question other than what my beliefs tell me happened in the Garden of Eden. I digress, a subject to approach another time.



Yes, this is a terrible debate to have watched.

In the wake of so many devastating events so early in the 2013 year, this one seems to have slipped into the minor headlines spotted at the bottoms of newspapers and websites.
But what a gut wrenching story to have witnessed in our lives.

This man operated for years undetected in the worst of environments in one the most powerful countries.
Call me naïve, but remember I live in a third world country and know the extent of trauma that happens behind closed doors. This is just something that almost seems unimaginable in such a large and powerful country. I cannot believe of this from my home land where education is so readily available and equality is so highly pushed.

Yet, it has and it continues to happen.

Kermit Gosnell was convicted on murder for three babies and involuntary manslaughter for a 41-year old woman. In my honest and true opinion, he got of easy.
The human side of me quails at the thought of what was done and reiterates in all its strength that there should be no chance for remorse, rehabilitation or salvation for someone so evil.
The Christian side of me knows that even he was a son of God and that our Lord mourns at the knowledge of what damage has been done.

My stomach overturns. This man operated a ‘late-term abortion’ clinic for years. In which, many stories have come forward of not only his complete and obvious discrimination towards minorities, but the horrendous environment in which women were exposed. The equipment was unsterile, broken in most cases, and it was quoted that the place reeked of ‘urine and blood.’ Women were subject to over dosage of low-quality drugs and even FORCED to go through with abortions after they’d changed their minds.

It was decided by a jury that even when abortions did not succeed and babies were born live, Gosnell killed them by severing the spine. This is where my tears roll.

I’m sorry but I literally cry upon writing those words. As I look at the innocence of my children and think back to the perfection that they were in the first instant that they were born, the cruelness and evil that a person would need to have within to commit such a heinous act is beyond what I can imagine or even wish to.

In this interview, the attorney argues that the babies were not alive and many of you will side with that. I, however, after following this case and reading numerous reports...I feel that he is wrong.

In the interview above, the attorney states that things went a little ‘awry’ and his reasoning later states that it is because no one checked on the clinic for over 15 years. I’m digress to point out that as a doctor and human being he should not need a legal service checking in on him to tell him that killing babies is WRONG!! His moral standing as a doctor (who is supposed to be there to HELP) should tell him that his clinic should be clean, sterile, fully functional, with proper medical staff, and not a place of murder! Why should the state need to do this? I’m thankful that there are checks and balances set in place because obviously we need it as a society because of people like Kermit Gosnell! However, my blood boils at the idea of using that as an excuse. ‘Oh, well no one was checking on him so he went about doing it’ WTF

So here is where I must be honest and accept the ridicule and judgment of others. Please try to remember that I do not judge anyone else’s decisions in life and can only follow what the Holy Spirit convicts me of. My opinions are just that….opinions based on my knowledge of the person of God and how He has changed my life.

I am anti-abortion. I believe that a person exists from the moment of conception. I believe this because I have known to many to have lost a child through miscarriage and still birth and know that it is impossible to tell them that that child did not exist as a person! Speak to any woman having gone through that loss and she will tell you that she lost a child….not an embryo. Abortion is the forcible killing of a child.
I shake as I consider the implications.
Many will argue with me then that I, too, commit a form of murder simply by taking birth control because is not that egg a possible child? Yes, that egg is a possible child. But it is yet to be a child. Believe me if God wants you pregnant, you will be pregnant regardless of that birth control. I know this first hand.
If you choose to take that extremist view then each time a guy ejaculates, he has committed murder because 100’s of sperm are released.
No, I’m sorry I do not believe contraceptive choices can be considered on the same level so please disregard that ideology in the comments.

I know there are so many arguments of which I cannot address each one individually and YES there are SO many extenuating circumstances that create SO many cases to go on.
I know that numerous girls are raped resulting in unwanted pregnancies and I cannot imagine the horror that girl has had to face. That child though is created by God. Satan and evil and sin cannot create life. ONLY GOD can do that. That unborn child that is never given the chance to breath was a child of God whom might have done wondrous things in this life. Who are we to say they don’t deserve a chance?
Yes, I am aware that there are thousands of children without proper homes in the world today….it is not to say then that we have the right to say there can be no more! I’d rather see a child given an opportunity.
And yes, I understand the fear that would come when being told that you probably would not make it through labor. And that even with all our medical knowledge today, we cannot save every mother in labor. But who are we to say that our life is so much more valuable than that childs??

Oh the arguments are endless….and I am not writing to convince you to change or mind or ask you to agree with me….
I’m writing as a loving mother. A mother who saw the absolute perfection of life when I looked into my newborns eyes. A mother who cannot stomach the idea that a man could kill a living baby and feel that there should be a special place in hell for someone so evil. A mother who….a mother who is lost when facing such pain. A mother who relies on the conviction of God and prays each night for the suffering of other women.

The fear these girls and women have faced, the weight that sits on their hearts today. I pray for them.

I pray that I may never be face to face with such evil.
I pray my sons may never know the weight of such decisions in life.
I pray for healing.

If you want to know more information or hear more indepth how I came to my side of the story....




I complete agree with the right to speak up and speak out and always appreciate your feedback on my posts. By all means we can discuss how this story affects us, makes us feel, and our opinions. You are free to voice your opinion openly in the comments, however, I strongly ask that anyone who is going to criticize or ridicule mine or any other person who comments own opinions....leave now!
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