Tuesday, 26 February 2013

I've lost it....

It’s half past eleven on a Sunday. I should be sleeping and enjoying this but….I’m writing this for your enjoyment instead.
I know I’m a great friend.
Lil Mister and Oupa are doing this….

And LJ is doing this….


















But I’m doing this!
Yes, I’m writing in Word. Internet is expensive in the third world so I write everything here then copy and paste. I’m economical!
Right now, at the current state of our lives, economical is a favorite word among ‘the wives.’ I don’t know if you picked up on it, but last year signified the end of any of our close friends being ‘single.’ Not that any of them actually were single. They were all coupled up but not hitched. Now they are.
So now…we are the wives! ;-)
Anytime we discuss getting together, we discuss what would be economical.
‘Let’s invite everyone over for a braai!’
‘Why yes, Hubby Dearest, a braai sounds so lekker! A fat steak, some wors, a garlic bread, and some brandy and coke. Hmm….but wouldn’t a mince pasta be more economical!’
‘We should all go see a movie.’
‘I’ve been dying to see the new Twilight, but I think we should be economical and check what is playing on TV.’
You get the picture!
Back on track. My Sunday morning has been completely off track. Actually, every weekend is off track lately. Ouma and our brother came to visit this weekend….here is my morning so far!
5:00- MAMA…MAMA….ek dudu here (translate Lil Mister screaming he wants in my bed)
                Ok…climb up. (Lil Mister: Scramble, kick, push on my belly, wiggle, squirm, flip over, wiggle….me: sigh)
                Papa….skaif (translate….move over) (Lil Mister: scramble, kick, wiggle, flip, wiggle…me: sigh)
5:15- peace and quiet
5:17- MAMA….MAMA…ek soek tee (I want tea)
                (me: sigh….get out of bed…make tea)
5:20- peace and quiet
5:21- LJ is awake to eat…insert breast…close eyes
5:25- burp, flip sides….insert breast…close eyes
5:30- burp
5:35- (Lil Mister: wiggle, squirm, wiggle, flip) Mama…ek dudu floor
                Me: okay
5:40- MAMAMAMAMAMAMAMAMA
                Me: WHAT?!?!
                Klar floor dudu, ek speel (I’m done sleeping I want to play)
5:45- grab LJ head back to Lil Misters room.
Why did I think I would sleep in…I’m not sure. I don’t remember changing his nappy in the night. Why is there a nappy on the floor in the hall? What is that smell? Side track to follow smell…..the culprit is found in the bathroom. I did not change his nappy. He took it off and left me a lovely present in the potty. Lay LJ in his crib. Distract Lil Mister with a tractor. Clean potty. Make coffee. Sit down on bedroom floor.
5:50- I attempt to relax to the enlightening sounds of a two year old making car noises. Take time to plan the day. Clean kitchen, do laundry, make breakfast, say goodbye to Ma and brother, clean lounge, scrub oven, do sewing while Lil Mister sleeps.
6:00- why is LJ awake again. OMW….that is a poo-splosion! Okay…move laundry up..must scrub now. Change nappy. What on earth am I eating that can be making your bum do that….oh oh are you kidding me?!? Did you just poo more why I’m wiping you? You…you better not….you are NOT smiling. This is not funny. (gag…cough…gag) Okay it’s funny that you think it’s funny. Stop…I’m suppose to be strong. Do…not…laugh…okay I’m laughing. Let me just drop our shirts in the bathroom sink with some water I’ll scrub them now. First…more coffee.
6:05- sit to drink coffee…..when is everyone going to wake up…yes Lil Mister it feels great for you to ram the hot wheels into my feet. Thank you….I’m slowly loosing it. They’re dragging me in. I cannot fight it any longer…and I’m lost in a world of toys.
6:30- Ma’s awake…I’ll make coffee.
And here is where it goes all to heck….(as if there was much structure so far!)
Now Lil Mister is out of his room. That was the cue. We’re no longer holding him back.
He must eat breakfast. He has medicine to take.
‘Will you eat cereal.’
‘Eat cereal’
‘What cereal?’
‘Cereal?’
‘Choose’ as I take out two boxes.
‘Choose’ as he takes both boxes.
I give up and poor some of each in a bowl.
He takes bowl puts in on his table and goes outside.
‘No, no, no. Cereal eat.’
‘Kick ball’
‘Cereal eat’
‘Ride bike’
‘CEREAL EAT’
Shaking head yes with a sly smile ‘cereal eat’
Okay, we’re back inside. When did his underpants end up in the lounge on the couch? Yes, look at these couches. I must clean them today. Add that to the list. The list….the kitchen….crap the shirts that need scrubbed! I better go do that now.
‘Okay, Lil Mister…eat!’
‘Eat.’
Let me just go to the bathroom. Oh, Pa and Hubby dearest are now awake. Let’s just have coffee first. Boil kettle and go to the bathroom.
Come back to kitchen.
Lil Mister is no where insight. Cereal is still on the table. I hear him…oh he’s in the fridge. Oh now you want yogurt. Fine…okay….just eat!
Make coffee. Sit down…drink coffee.
Get a duvet in washing machine.
LJ is awake again. Okay feed LJ.
Hubby Dearest leaves for work.
Ma wants photos loaded to her phone before she leaves.
Clean some dishes.
Lil Mister has spread yogurt on my window.
Kick a ball outside with Lil Mister.
Say goodbye to Ma.
Make coffee….OMW…it’s 11 o’clock!
Therefore…my day has accomplished very little I planned and the time has slipped through my fingers like it was water. Do you ever have days like this?
....Coffee is all that makes it better....

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Shana..

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