I know I should be letting go of this situation. I should be trusting in God. I know that whether we go or we stay...it will be His plan and His word that leads us.
However, I feel Satan prying on my weaknesses. I feel him playing with my ideal picture of everything just falling into place. I feel him nudging those doubts and fears into my heart each day. I feel him making me question whether or not we can really do this!
I started crying on the way to work this morning as Hubby and I discussed the possibility of spending some time apart from each other because the job would require him to move before it would be possible for me and the kids. I'm not scared because I think I can't be on my own. I don't want to do it! I don't want to be without him for even one weekend....let alone weeks! But I want to support him! I want to shoo him out the door like everything is going to be fine and dandy and we will be back in each others arms that evening!
But I'm not going to allow him to succeed. God is bigger....and He is in control. And we WILL follow Him. So, I've been listening a lot to this song.....asking God to set me free.....
Free from my fears
Free from Satans attacks
Free from my uncertainty
Free from my desire to control
Free from my questions
Free from the world....
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